she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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