I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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