I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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