Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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