I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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