Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize