So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize
