before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
