well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
