is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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