once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
