You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
