Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
