Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
