Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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