if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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