So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
