So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
