why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
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