Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Randomize
