why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I need a burrito and a hug.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize