either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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