I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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