her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize