some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Randomize
