Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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