ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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