Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
