you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.