Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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