The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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