And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
