now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Who died my cat blue again?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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