Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
