Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
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