i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
