Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize
