everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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