he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
