plz talk dirty to me
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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