At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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