I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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