I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
