According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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