Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
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