i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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