Sry I called you an 8
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize