She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
