Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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