Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
We have started to decorate penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
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